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Tuesday, October 12, 2010

I Cannot Ever Appear To Allow That The Weather We Are Having At Any Given Time But Always Look To What Might Be On The Way Before Much Longer

/ On : 12:41 AM

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By Jon Izzard

Here we go. The customary rumours have begun as the idealists of the parish begin to look speculatively to the heavens and state their total belief that we are about to have an Indian summer. You can see where it originated from, we had bbq conditions last week and now that the children are going back to school (to the relief of most guardians I suspect), the upturn is predictable.

The weather is reason for so many of our little customs at various times of the year. The Indian summer around September, every year in November the Daily Express will run a story that we are in for a monstrous arctic winter (they were spot on last year though, who knew?) In December we watch to the forecasts in the hope of news of a white xmas. And then during March when the winter skies, heavy cloud, cold rain, frosty cars and freezing winds have got us all thoroughly fed up then we look out for signs of spring, blossom forming on the trees, daffodils sprouting up through the ground, early snowdrops and crocus blooming. And then when the blossom has dropped and the daffodils fade away, the football season ends and we begin to talk about the summer, where we are going for holidays, will there be hosepipe bans and how will the climate affect the Test match series?

In our place the bbq books get their brushing off and the steel brush is unearthed to give the grills a scrubbing around April. This year we got a new gas bbq to replace the old and knackered kettle charcoal bbq which had arrived at the end of its life, so we will have to check the gas, the connector and decide if we need a new bottle.

If we view the conditions for the summer on a scale from the drought of 1976 to the monsoon of 2007, we can gauge the ideal bbq to use for those with the capability. The nearer the pointer points towards 2007, the more likely you'd need to use a gas bbq as the reliability of sparking the fire will be the advantage over attempting to get briquettes going in inclement conditions.

Whatever the weather, the aroma of the bbq is the olfactory messenger of a summer, along with the heartbreak to be expected with being an England football supporter during an international championship year, the horror of using an airport to fly on holiday and the amazement at the tardiness of the airport procedures at the other end compared to the UK and the soreness of getting sunburnt despite our best efforts to protect from it this time.

I don't know about anyone else, but I usually appear to look forward 6 months and imagine the weather for that seadson as an ideal. I could be standing over a charcoal bbq with the heat of the furnace on my face and the sun on my back and I will find myself anticipating biting cold air and the crunch of snow under foot. The reality will be driving wind, hard freezing rain in the face and slippery ice under the shoes.

It's a peculiar thing, for some reason I can't just make the most of the conditions we have at the present, I'm always anticipating that which is to come. - 24553

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